Kobolds Ate My Baby Adventure: Trick & Treat Troubles.

Posted by: Jason Silverain / Category: , , , , , , ,

With Halloween Approaching trick or treaters will soon be knocking at our doors demanding candy in exchanged for not toilet papering our houses, some Dungeon Masters attempt to run horror games and sessions I personally find that while the occasional knock may scare the life out of the players at the right moment more often than not it spoils the flow of the game.

So instead I tend to play something a little lighter, something like Zombies!!!, All Flesh Must Be Eaten or as in this case Kobolds Ate My Baby.
If you are unfamiliar with Kobolds Ate My Baby, KAMB is considered one of the earliest "Beer and Pretzels game" which is any of a class of tabletop games that are light on rules and strategy, feature a high amount of randomness and a light often humorous theme.

In Kobolds Ate My Baby you play the aforementioned kobold under the ruler ship of King Torg (All Hail King Torg) Lord Of The Chicken Bone Throne who requires the players to go out to the nearby human town and bring back the freshest, human babies you can find (along with whatever else his taste buds desire that day) or risk been thrown into the cook pot themselves.

Games often last little more than hour and can be easily picked up with fresh characters, in fact death and chaos is common place with it been fully expected that players will die at least a few times, as those who don't throw themselves headlong into danger and excitement risk incurring the wrath of Vor the big red angry god who HATES cowards.

So in the spirit of Halloween I have design a short one shot adventure for KAMB where our clueless little fuzzballs encounter Halloween for the first time and must gather candy tribute for the glory of King Torg (All Hail King Torg). While Kobolds Ate My Baby in Colour was used to design the encounters the adventure can easily be adapted for earlier editions or for the Home Brew Kobolds Ate My Baby (TG Edition) which is designed for play by post.
Finally thanks must be given to Labyrinthian over at the Labyrinth for designing the map used for this adventure and making available for free.

For clarification like many publications by WOTC's or 3rd party writers italic paragraphs will sections to be read out to the players with alterations if needed while regular text is information for the Dungeon Master.

Kobolds Ate My Baby Adventure: Trick & Treat Troubles

This short adventure is design for between 4 to 6 Kobolds and should take approximately a hour and a half to complete depending on how much trouble and chaos occurs.
This adventure contains several customised items and rule variants which will be listed at the end of the area descriptions

The following paragraph should be read just before or during character creation.

Things have been quiet in the Grand Larder Cellar of King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) but tonight the humans nearby have been seen giving tributes of sweets to various monsters visiting their homes. King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) feels that it is only fitting that tribute be collected in his name and you.. yes you have been sent out with your comrades to one of the nearby villages to gather it. 
Oh and whoever brings back the least tribute best bring back something for dinner unless they want to risk been in the pot.

During this adventure the Kobolds will have the advantage that at first the humans within the town will believe they are trick or treaters and gain the benefits similar to the Winning Smile Edge.

However should any kobold act in a manner that causes the humans to attack (such as eat a cat in front of a little old lady) then every undisguised kobold (those not in costume) will lose this benefit to the affected human. In this case Kobolds with Winning Smile can use this edge to continue to fool the Humans into believing they are a innocent trick or treaters.

Once play is ready to begin read the following.

Gear in hand your motley group departs from the run down manor in which the Grand Larder Cellar resides seen off by the long forks of King Torgs (All Hail King Torg!) Royal Guard The Royale Wid Cheez. As you approach Stickston surprisingly all in one piece a commotion up ahead catches your attention as a group of thin spindly humans seem to be dangling a rather large imp upside down. Taking its brown bag from its hands they drop the imp as you near, giving you a dirty look while they suck on their smoke sticks before walking past you up the path from were you came. 
It seems without tribute to steal you were of no interest to them. 

The Kobolds now enter the map as a group, this can be done randomly though I recommend beginning at the path next to house 1 and each Kobold is capable of moving up to five squares.
With the exception of houses 1, 7 and 8 all doors to the houses are located on the South facing wall of each house, House 1 door is located on the East path facing side of the building and 7 and 8's are located on the north of the building respectively.


House 1: Farm House "Witch" 
Occupants: 1 Old Human (Woman), 1 Cat
Loot: 4 Cooking Utensils, Kitchen Knife, a bowl containing 12 candy, Sack of Potatoes, Big Cook Pot.

Ahead of you a small human child with an impressively big witches hat and black dress with a pair of equally small zombies knocks at the spider web covered door of the old house, the door opening with a creak the small group roars as a elderly looking witch (with equally impressive hat) begins to hand out a small piece of candy placing it it into the tribute bags (or pumpkin in the small witches case) each of them is holding. Seemingly satisfied the little witch and her minions move on and the door closes.

While your candy hungry kobolds might be wanting to ambush and steal from the Trick or Treaters, this scene is to introduce the Kobolds into the concept of trick or treating so it might be for the best if the Tricker or Treaters escape harm (for now).

Kobolds approaching the house will see that it looks like most human dwellings though seemingly thick spider webs like its walls and that a pair of hollow carved pumpkins sit either side of the door.
If any of the Kobolds are interested of taking a look inside the house there is a solitary window which shutters are ajar on the south side of the house, however the window is a little high for the average kobold so Sport rolls or something to stand on (like another kobold) will be needed. 

If the kobold in question gets around that problem the old black cat Grumpo is currently resting on the windowsill and will happily take a swing at anyone disturbing his nap but behind him the entire bowl of candy is sat on a table beside the window.
The old woman is sitting in a rocking chair by the firepit on the other side of the room reading a book with her and is unlikely to notice any commotion unless its very obvious.

Trick Or Treating  

Any kobold who turns up to a house, knocks and shouts trick or treating, All Hail King Torg or generally roars will be given candy.

The first kobold at a house gets two pieces of candy, any further "trick or treaters" not in a different costume or disguise only gets one due to "copying costumes". If they turn up in a group then randomly roll to see who gets the bonus candy (usually those with the highest luck, Winning Smile or pushing to the front will find themselves at a advantage.)

If the kobolds are clever (or greedy) they might be able to get further candy from an already visited house by getting a new costume/disguise but there is only so much candy to be handed out.

As candy is so small they will usually be able to hold two in each paw, after that additional candy melts in their grubby mitts getting their paws all sticky and unpleasant so finding something to put the candy in is vital. 

1a: Backyard
Loot: Washing Line with a sheet, and some very large bloomers hanging on it, an old bucket with a few pegs.

Just a few items for the kobolds to start creating costumes from and the bucket can be held in one hand as used as a Tribute Bag.

House 2: Baby Sitters 
Occupants: 2 Teenages (Kids: Good), 1 Baby!
Loot: A bowl containing 10 candy, Cooking Utensil, Hoodie, kid's clothes, backpack, Baby!

This Human dwelling walls are painted bright and various small colourful paper chains hanging
from its roof along the building, while there are several windows around the building all the shutters are closed but the sound of giggling can be heard within. A large looking tomb stone and a pumpkin carved with a massive jagged mouth sit by the door.

When/if the kobolds knock on this door:

The door opens and behind it stands a tall, scrawny red faced human looking down at you, a waft of hot air drifting out catches your nose and the scent is unmistakable there is a delicious baby somewhere within!  

At this point if the kobolds don't immediately attack they are most likely planning their heist and trying to figure out how to get around the human.

The simplest ways to do this are:
  • Attempt to sneak past him (2 Dice Sneak Roll) when his back is turned to collect the candy bowl, which may cause issues if all the kobolds do this at once.
  • Get the ladder from area 6 and go down the chimney suffering a little bit of fall damage. 
  • Break open one of the window shutters and climb in but this may be noisy.
Once inside the House 2 is very simple been only a main room which consists of a kitchen/dining room with plenty of places to hide and a pair of doors leading to bedrooms, one of which contains the other babysitter and the other in which the baby in a pumpkin costume (which may confuse our poor kobolds as it smells like baby but looks like vegetable) lays in its cot.

House 3: Farm House "Halloween Party"
Occupants: 1 Townies, 1 Elf (Adventurer), 5 kids
Loot: A bowl containing 11 candy, a large bowl of Punch (2 handed,), several plates of crisps, cold sausage and cheese on a stick (enough for 2 fillers), Red Table Cloth.

A red clothed table covered plates of snacks sits outside this rather well kept dwelling, it seems the humans here know how to give tribute in style with drinks and fine cheeses. A pair of werewolves, flesh golum and two zombies from seem to taking part in various contests while observed by two humans, one of which is wearing a pair of obviously fake elf ears and holding a bowl of candy.. really who would pretend to be a elf?

The kobolds are welcome to help themselves to the snacks though may get strange looks if they begin pouring them into their tribute bags, the couple won't turn hostile towards the kobolds unless they do anything very wrong like attacking the children. 

3a: Party Games

Pin The Wings On The Fairy: You could use a Extraneous roll here to determine success but if you have a spare piece of paper handy draw a quick outline of a person on the paper and place it on the floor or on the table. Give the Player a pen (lid on), tell him to close his eyes and attempt to put the point of the pen in the middle of the fairies back whilst guided by his fellow kobolds.
If he succeeds he gets a candy or a skeleton mask (1 Armour)
Anyone caught cheating take a Kobold Horrible Death Cheque.  

Piñata: At 2 people must take part and up to four can try at once, if not enough kobolds are available of the kids will join in instead.

Note the following is easier if you have a grid for yourself with details and one for the players to see.

Player Grid

DM Grid

  1. Randomly determine which corner each Kobold begins in but do not tell them, they are blindfolded remember. The arrows represent their starting direction.
  2. Decide in which of the four centre squares the Piñata is located, it has 8 Hits and Agility 2.
  3. Each turn a Kobold can perform 3 actions which can be from any of the following:
    1. Move one square.
    2. Turn 90 degrees.
    3. Attack
  4. Anyone wishing to use a Wacking Stick (4 Dam) will need to Heft it.
  5. Continue until someone is horribly injured or the Piñata is destroyed.
  6. The  Piñata contains 15 candy for kobolds to grab.
Bobbing for apples: 3 Dice Wrassle Rolls to grab an apple serious failure may result in drowning. 

House 4: Weavers House
Occupants: 1 Dirt Merchant, 1 Old Human, 1 Bird.
Loot:  A bowl containing 6 candy, cook pot of oxtail soup (1 hit), wooden ladle, a massive stack of baskets, bowls and hampers.

This humble dwelling has a small sign with pictures of various baskets hanging above its door and from a nearby open window the warm of a fire and the smell of something wonderful cooking teases you.

Any particular scrawny or injured looking kobolds will be fussed over by the couple and ushered into the house to receive a bowl of soup, of course a kobold may assume the worse and be expected to be put into the soup.

House 5: Tavern 
Occupants: 1 Innkeeper, 1 Wench, 2 Veteran, 1 Old Human.
Loot: A dozen packets of peanuts, Grog & Beer on Tap, 4 bottles of random booze, mugs (2 Dam), Beer Mats. 

The kobolds won't get any candy here as the locals just want a quiet night, any attempts at trick or treating will result in several metal disks (coins) been shoved into the kobolds hands or if they are insistent (mostly by pointing) they may get a packet of nuts. A enterprising kobold may be able to collect enough dregs of drinks to make a dirty pint (treat as grog) but if they really want loot without a fight they are going to have to Steal it from the bar or Sneak into the Beer Cellar (3 Dice Sneak Check).

Beer Cellar
Occupants: 1 Giant Rat
Loot: Several empty Kegs, Several huge kegs of grog, 8 Strong Booze (+1 on roll when rolling to see what it is), 4 cheese wheels, 4 legs of mutton, a whole dried pork (Heft), A chest full of metal disks.
With luck the kobolds have snuck (or murdered) their way into the Beer Cellar, they are can collect the bottles of good booze easily but if they attempt to take the cheese wheels the rat will attack.

House 6: Empty House 
Occupants: 4 Giant Rats
Loot: Ladder, Salt and Pepper Shakers, Colander, 1 Dead Human (adult, partly eaten), 2 Pumpkins. Cleaver. Sack of Feathers, Golden Syrup.

Description outside:

A trio of (rather tall) goblins are knocking angry at the door but there seems to be no reply, taking what appears to be toilet roll from their tribute bags they begin to dance around the dwelling hurling the rolls over the roof watching them unroll. A poor throw cause a roll to land on the hat of the Scarecrow of the adjoining vegetable patch and the sound of nervous clucking can be heard from the chicken coop.

If the kobolds approach the trick or treaters they are offered a toilet roll to join in, otherwise the three soon grow bored and walk off. If the kobold attack the trick or treaters use the Kids (Bad) stats and they have loot of 4 candy each.

6a: Vegetable Patch And Chicken Coop 
Occupants: 5 Chickens
Loot: Enough Root Vegetables for 2 fillers, 2 Pumpkins, Toilet Paper, a Scarecrow, Chicken.

Getting inside the area is easy enough as the gate is unlocked but if for any reason the Kobolds wish to climb the fence than a 2 Dice Sports Check is required. Likewise the Chicken Coop is easy to enter but a unwary kobold may end up pecked to death.
The scarecrow takes a 1 Dice Heft Check to carry or can be stripped for a cloth sack, straw hat and chequered shirt.   

Any one examining the dwelling closer will notice the side door in the garden is slightly open and the house could be entered that way.

The house is pitch black inside but your keen senses let you see clearly, the smell of death hangs in the air like the necromancer Nodknows old socks and the sound of gnawing can be heard.

If the Kobolds actually enter:

A pool of dried blood and what seems to be a partly eaten human adult lays next to what you think is a swivel chair, from the darkness the beady eyes of several large rats (or snacks as you like to think of them) gaze with hateful hunger.

If the Kobolds want to loot the house they will have to deal with the hungry rats first, also anyone trying to stand on the swivel chair takes not 1 but 2 Kobold Horrible Death Cheques

House 7: Herbalist 
Occupants: 1 Mage
Loot: Hooded Robes, 5 Random Spell Pages, Pumpkin Pie (heals 2 hit), Poker, Booze, A Sack Of Spices.

This small human dwelling is ill kept even by kobold standards and you live in a hole in the ground. The weeds are Kobold-high and the paint is peeling from the walls, it seems there used to be a window but its shutters have been nailed shut and a faded picture of a pestle and mortar is painted upon it. A note is hooked upon the door with human scribbles all over it and a arrow pointing behind the house. 

The Herbalist is quite disliked in Stickston generally rude, cruel and foul tempered, its likely that if the Kobolds don't finish him off tonight the villagers will in the next few days after they learn about the note.

The note reads "Those looking for candy, go around the back and get what is coming to you." leading any would be trick or treaters to his angry dog Bruno.
Whilst been a mage the Kobolds will have the advantage while attempting to break in that the Herbalist is asleep unless their banging wakes him up, at which point he answers the door to yell at those who disturb him. 

7a: Big Dog 

Occupants: Big Dog, Kid (Good)
Loot: Hollow Pumpkin (actually plastic), 13 Pieces Of Candy, Large Joint Of Meat, Spiked Collar (1 Armour)
Turning the corner you hear a growl and the rattle of chain, before you is the biggest dog you've ever seen (admittedly the only dog you've ever seen but its still big) with short black fur and long sharp teeth almost rivalling your own.  A long metal chain running from its spiked collar is attached to a pole nearby by which sits a large joint of meat, at its feet candy is spilling out across the ground from a dropped pumpkin. The small witch you saw earlier is leaning back trapped against the wall of the dwelling just inches from the dogs snapping maw.

Bruno the dog is a bad dog, like his owner he is foul tempered and hates children and gets into fights regularly, even Animal Chum won't help here.

8B 6E 4E 6R / 2 AGL / Wrassle / Bite 2 Dam / 2 VP
Should any poor Kobold with the In Heat Boogie be Wrassled by Bruno they must instantly make a Kobold Horrible Death Check.

Of course the kobolds could try and simply sneak past Bruno and steal his joint of meat but they should remember Vor HATES cowards but those brave (and surviving) Kobolds who rid the world of this bad dog will find themselves rewarded with a hug, a kiss on the cheek, candy and a bonus epilogue if they survive the adventure.
After Bruno is dealt with the girl flees (after fore mentioned hugs) abandoning her candy, if any particular Kobold was active in defending her she also gives them her Impressive Witch Hat (2 Armour)  

House 8: Blacksmith 
Occupants: 1 Horse
Loot: Possible Weapons, Foodbag, Human Size Large Hammer (Heft), Horseshoes (1 Dam), Rope, Leather Straps, Bucket, Broomstick and Nails.

While mostly made of stone, this building barely seems like a dwelling compared to the house across the road, most of the building is a open workshop filled with metal and tools and even at night there is a smell of soot and heat wafting from inside. Beside the building a horse is tied up, a large foodbag hooked around its head and a nearby well. 

More items for your Kobolds to get crafty with, while most of the items here are far too big for a kobold to even consider using succeeding on a 3 Dice Extraneous Roll will allow them to find a Long Dagger that they can use as a Sword (2 Dam).

Removing the feedbag from the horse is another issue, unless the kobold in question has Animal Chum they can expect to be stepped on.

12B 4E 2E 5R / 2 AGL / Bash / Kick 2 Dam* / 5 VP
* Anyone stood behind the horse can be struck with a mighty wallop for double damage and sent flying.

Heading Home

Once your Kobolds feel that they have collected enough tribute (or caused enough destruction) once they reach the edge of the map they can be considered to have escaped, once all the Kobolds have escaped (or died) there is one last encounter. 

Scurrying away with your (hopefully) mighty haul you begin the long walk home, thankfully like your trip to Stickston it is uneventful apart from a fortunate (and tasty) snack of crickets. Pushing open the large creaking doors of the ruined manor that sits atop the Grand Larder Cellar of King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) you all feel a angry growl rising from your throat at the sight of three familiar thin spindly human sucking on smoke sticks in the great hall. Spotting you enter the largest of the group laughs gesturing at your loot, they intend to steal your hard earned tribute!

If your group has been behaving at the Hamlet throughout the session this is the chance for their monstrous side to emerge or in the case of those angry evil little Kobolds one final chance for a blood bath.

Drunk Yobbos x 3
4B 4E 6E 4R / 1 AGL / Bully / Fist 1 Dam / 1 VP 

If your group is rather battered and you don't like the idea of possibly ending on a Total Party Kill (while anticlimactic rather fitting for Kobolds) feel free for the commotion to attract the attention of King Torgs (All Hail King Torg!) Royal Guard The Royale Wid Cheez who overwhelm the drunks carrying them away to the cook pot kicking and screaming.

Now that is left is to counting up the individual bonus victory points (VP):
For every 2 Candy returned gain 1 VP.
For food items gain VP equal to amount of Hits the items restores.
If a Baby was brought back and the Kobold responsible is automatically safe from the cook pot and gains a mighty 8 VP.

If the kobolds have any items they wish to attempt to cook they can try now though anyone with less than 5 VP at the end of the game ends up in the cook pot as part of the Tribute meal.
Those with more than 5 VP but less than 10 VP take part in the celebration feast at their usual tables but with first dibs on the various lesser snacks that come, finally those with more than 10 VP are granted a seat at the grand table of King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) and able to sample the delights crafted by King Torgs (All Hail King Torg!) personal cook the Iron Chef himself.  

Finally a little epilogue

Tales of adventure that night spread throughout the warren further fuelled by the hats and costumes you proudly wear, many give you snacks to hear your story of the night and life is easy for a time eventually King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) appoints you his Official Tribute Gatherers for each yearly tribute. 

Bonus epilogue for saving the girl from Bruno:

Time passes and while you've gotten older and more scarred you've kept your Impressive Witch Hat as a mark of your station of Official Tribute Gatherer taking good care of the trophy over the years. Unexpectedly you find yourself escorted into the presence of King Torg (All Hail King Torg!) by the royal guard, by the mighty Lord Of The Chicken Bone Throne stands a tall human Witch whose eyes light up upon seeing you. With a mighty voice his Largeness commands "You are to be chief minion of the troops sent to this Witch."

I hope you've all enjoyed this little adventure, please leave comments below and I think I may just leave a few of my own with any further details I decide upon when reviewing this adventure.

For further information on Kobolds Ate My Baby and All Flesh Must Be Eaten see the links below:

Kobolds Ate My Baby - Wikipedia 
Kobolds Ate My Baby - Scribd 3rd Edition
Kobolds Ate My Baby - Deluxx Edition Review
9th Level Games

All Flesh Must Be Eaten - Wikipedia
All Flesh Must Be Eaten - Review


  1. gargirl Says:

    This adventure is so much fun! We'd never played before and I decided to try and run a game at last. It was great having an adventure pre-made that I could just read through and not have to make the whole thing up. THANK YOU!!!! Next time I will run Short and Sweet. ^_^

  1. Jason Silverain Says:

    Thank you very much its always great to have feedback on these adventures and know that people are enjoying them.
    I've several more ideas in the works, a train robbery which can be combat or stealth focused called Ticket To Ride and a Shadowrun Cyberpunk inspired adventure call Snack Runners (All Hail Torg Corp).

    If there is particular elements of the adventures you would prefer to see more of or think could be improved then please let me know.

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